1. I'm a sarcastic asshole at times.
2. Why I hate policies.
Before we went on vacation recently to Arizona I made some calls to find a new place to board my dog. I typically take him to a place here in town but they aren't open on Sundays and they keep him in a fairly small cell with no activities. I am what you may call an overzealous dog owner and I want my boy to feel like he's on vacation to. After calling a few places that had no vacancies I finally reached a place in Collinsville that had an opening. They asked some basic questions about his name (Cubby), breed (Golden Retriever), age (7), etc. So we basically have a fully domesticated, adult male Golden Retriever.
This is a picture of my dog. Very vicious looking right?
They first asked me what day I wanted to bring him in and when I said "Tomorrow" they said "Oooh, that's going to be a problem." I asked what the problem was and was informed there was a mandatory (and paid) 6 hour socialization test to make sure my dog wasn't violent or aggressive. They do know what a Golden Retriever is right? I don't think a more gentle, docile and loving animal exists. I've been around Goldens my entire life and have never met one that wasn't sweet and playful.
So this conversation happened:
Me: You are aware this is for a Golden Retriever right?
Dumbass: Yes, but this policy is for any dog.
Me: Who came up with this policy?
Dumbass: Our owner, who is a veterinarian.
Me: Is she familiar with a Golden Retriever?
Dumbass: Of course, many Goldens stay here.
Me: And have you had any issues with them? You know, like them biting each other, eating small childrens faces off, killing the young, playing puppy fight club? You know, stuff like that?
Dumbass: I understand what you're saying sir, but it's a policy.
Me: Do most of your customers have 6 hours to come and watch their dog play with other dogs? Oh, and pay you for the privilege?
Dumbass: It is an issue for alot of people.
Me: I think we just found out why you have openings when no one else does. Thanks.
Click.
Again, this is my dog. We ended up having family take care of him and all was well.
End of story.
This is NOT a sales pitch for a Golden, but I will say that if anyone asks me what dog to get I only have one answer. There is a reason. I have had 4 Goldens in my life and each one is sweeter than the next. I can't imagine a better family dog. And the brain..sheesh, I'm pretty sure my dog understands me. There is a reason that Goldens are chosen for drug sniffing, cadaver location, service assistance, emotional therapy and a wide range of other demanding roles. Oh, and they're highly sought after in the hunting world, the name "retriever" isn't an accident.
And take a look around you when you're in the store, especially the pet aisle. Goldens are used to hawk everything from dog food to baked beans to insurance to cars. They're all over print media, movies, TV and advertising. This is not an accident.
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